A Balancing Meditation for Hard Emotions

Life often presents us with hard emotions—grief, anger, fear, sadness—that can feel overwhelming and unmanageable. These emotions, while natural, have a way of throwing us off-balance, clouding our judgment and leaving us feeling disconnected from ourselves and others. In such moments, finding a way to navigate our feelings without suppressing them or being consumed by them is essential. I recently needed help doing just that.

In the span of just a few months, I lost two beloved uncles, followed by a sewage rupture in my basement. Meanwhile, the news and my social feeds erupted with people battling one another, creating a heartbreaking mess. I’d had it with surprises and volatility. I needed a big injection of balance.

“Universe, bring me some joy for a change!” I implored during one morning meditation, then picked up my well-worn copy of the Tao Te Ching. The text is composed of 81 poetic chapters that explore the nature of the experience of life and how to live in harmony with it. Central to the Tao Te Ching is the concept of balance: the interplay of yin and yang, opposing but complementary forces that sustain the universe. Understanding these forces can help us better align with nature’s effortless flow.

One common challenge among humans is that we belong to a species that tries to push through everything, including our emotions. We also tend to see things from either/or and good/bad perspectives. In moments of immense emotionality, we may get stuck in limited, dualistic thinking. A symbol of Taoism, taijitu in transliterated Chinese, can help us here. This symbol represents the Taoist concepts of yin (阴) and yang (阳), which we are urged to not view in opposition, but rather through the lens of entanglement. Visually, the symbol shows a black section and white section side by side. Dots within each section signify that each force contains a seed of the other, emphasizing interconnectedness: a white dot in the black, a black dot in the white.

Balancing meditation offers a gentle and transformative approach to challenging emotions by doing the same. Instead of resisting or drowning in emotional turmoil, balancing meditation helps us cultivate an inner steadiness, fostering compassion for ourselves and others. We can open to the possibility of “good” in the “bad” and the potential for “bad” within seemingly “good” actions we may take. Taoist-inspired practices don’t erase difficult emotions but transform our relationship with them, allowing us to move forward with resilience.

A Tao-Inspired Meditation

1. Stand up.

2. Take a deep breath.

3. Gently close your eyes.

4. Hold out your left hand palm-up in front of you at about waist level, your forearm at 90 degrees to your body and parallel to the ground.

5. Bring to mind any personal troubles you are having and envision placing them in your outstretched hand. Add any emotions about worldly challenges there, too. Keep adding images, memories, and emotions into your left hand. As you add each one, feel your hand lowering down in front of your body. Continue until your heart feels unburdened.

6. Take a few deep breaths, feeling the weight in your hand.

7. Now, hold your right hand in front of you at about waist level, your forearm at 90 degrees to your body and parallel to the ground.

8. Envision filling this hand with good memories, hopes, and emotions that feel positive to you. As you do so, alternate lifting and lowering your left and right hands in a slow, gentle movement, like two children playing on a seesaw.

9. Breathe slowly as your hands continue to move up and down independent of each other. Feel the shifting of balance that occurs—never static, ever-changing. Continue for a few minutes.

10. When your practice feels complete, very slowly bring the palms of your hands together and feel the energy between them. Imagine your positive and negative emotions entangling together, any distinct boundaries blurring. Acknowledge that this is the experience of life and the ever-changing stream of actions, reactions, and emotions. Notice how it feels to acknowledge this.

11. Take a few more deep breaths.

12. Gently open your eyes.

13. Consider journaling any feelings or “Aha!” thoughts.

Going Deeper

• Learn more about living in harmony with the Tao in every facet of your life with Eva Wong’s handbook Being Taoist: Wisdom for Living a Balanced Life.

• Try I Ching Divination for Tackling Overwhelm.

• Pick up the daily reader 365 Tao: Daily Meditations.

• Take a free course in Taoism and Chinese Philosophy from Harvard University.

• Study Taoist wellness practices online with Master Gu.

Incorporating Taoist principles and balancing meditation into our lives can help us better align with the natural flow of life and embrace and appreciate both stillness and movement. By cultivating harmony within, we can learn to navigate life’s challenges with greater grace and clarity, fostering profound connections to ourselves, others, and the greater balance of existence.

Enjoy creative meditations? Read “A Pre-Spring Sun Meditation.”