Letting Go of Shame

Q. I spend some of my time connecting with people on social media. I’m hyper aware of the shaming culture that can exist in social media interactions. I’m also conscious of old feelings of shame rising up in me, perhaps as a result of what I continuously witness and experience online. How can I separate from and let go of the shame I’m carrying within me?

First of all, it’s essential to validate how witnessing and observing the shaming culture has informed your conscious awareness! Good for you! Truth is, we all participate in the collective consciousness, which includes our massive unconscious shadow, of which shame is a part. The more we observe, notice and take action on evolving and elevating our contribution individually and collectively, the more energy we place on evolution.

While few are fans of shame, you might be surprised to discover how many people are fooled by it.

Let me ask you, what makes you feel ashamed?

When we get to the bottom of our shame, we often find that it arises from operating differently from someone else’s version of what we’re allowed to do or be. When our authentic desire to do or be on our own terms runs into the indoctrinated roles or behaviors from others, shame emerges.

I’ve met women who feel ashamed when they choose themselves, because they were taught to put other people’s needs ahead of their own. I’ve met men who feel shame when they experience softer emotions or cry, because they were imprinted with someone else’s version of masculinity.

Shame examples are as endless as our collective experiences. It’s likely that most all of us have felt shame at least once in our lives, and some are deeply familiar with shame patterns and their impact.

The online shaming culture is a powerful energetic. Like any powerful energy or force, it builds on itself, increasing its energy through repetition, escalation and conscious and unconscious participation.

We steep in the shame, don’t we? We observe it, feel it, do it, talk about it, post about it (yes, including this one), thus increasing its energetic footprint in the Cosmic field.

Collective shame feeds individual shame and vice versa. We do have the ability to impact the energetic footprint of collective shame by releasing our own shame.

Joseph Campbell wrote, “We're not on our journey to save the world but to save ourselves. But in doing that you save the world. The influence of a vital person vitalizes.”

The emotional quagmire of shame derails autonomy and growth. Shame is one of the lowest vibrations in the emotional spectrum. Dr. David Hawkins reflects shame as vibrating lower than guilt, which is an equally derailing energetic. [Source: Power vs. Force: The Hidden Determinants of Human Behavior, David R. Hawkins, M.D., Ph.D.] If raising vibration is a spiritual concept that evolves both the individual and the collective, letting go of individual shame is an imperative.

Think of it this way: the shaming story of who you could/should/must be is a program or pattern that was deposited in your energetic bank account. You have the power and authority to shift your portfolio, and eliminate underperforming holdings that don’t match your investment profile, i.e., Who You Are.

A spiritual, energetic practice for releasing shame

1. Anchor your awareness in your body and breathe gently

2. Place an imaginary flower in front of you, about one foot beyond the boundary of your aura

3. Ask for the shame that you’re carrying to move out of your field and on to the flower

4. Destroy the energy and the flower by imagining throwing a bright, sparkling ball of golden, Cosmic energy onto the flower.

5. The flower and the energy explode, freeing you, and lightening up the collective.

6. Bring another bright, sparkling ball of golden, Cosmic flow down through your crown, your body and out your feet, replenishing and expanding your energy.

Stepping out of individual shame allows disengagement from institutional, social media-driven, and collective shame. What an investment to make in your authentic self!